Off Topic > General Furry Talk

Women at Furry Conventions

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yagfox:

--- Quote from: Cheetah on 29.11.2013, 14:25:09 --- However how do we get rid of that psychological effect that makes women FEEL insecure without trying to force our demographics?

--- End quote ---

I suspect reiterating the very small number of reported cases would help. Otherwise this thread does come across as quite frightening, as it is full of past bad experiences, and doesn't really paint a true picture of what you're likely to encounter.

Jumpy:

--- Quote from: EchoesAbove on 04.12.2013, 11:00:38 ---if someone's following you, how on earth are you supposed to get the name and badge number?

--- End quote ---

Just point them out to a member of security instead.

If you don't feel comfortable approaching a stalker yourself, security will be happy to ask them to leave you alone for you.

Just please don't expect security to take further action the first time if all the person did was follow you at a distance. You see, If you have not approached this person yourself before and asked them to leave you alone, this is the first direct warning they get.

If the behaviour persists, talk to security again.


--- Quote ---What I DID have is meeting someone, who I talked to once during the EF. I returned home to a Skype add... and a lot of pictures of my butt while in Suit. I too have been asked if it's possible to do a "private shooting" of said butt at the next EF. Was easily solved by a NO though.

--- End quote ---

That is the best solution. So many awkward situations could be prevented if everyone just mustered the courage to say a clear "NO".

Suicune:

--- Quote from: EchoesAbove on 04.12.2013, 11:00:38 ---What I DID have is meeting someone, who I talked to once during the EF. I returned home to a Skype add... and a lot of pictures of my butt while in Suit. I too have been asked if it's possible to do a "private shooting" of said butt at the next EF. Was easily solved by a NO though.

--- End quote ---

I know how that feels like. I know 2 people who creeped me online after a convention. One them after EF.
And I think I would give that person a hurting facepaw on the next convention if he/she would make pictures of my butt without asking me
Everyone can make photos of me, even without asking. But only "normal" photos, not of certain areas -.-

I think thats a main reason why girls don't want to visit Furcons, there are some guys who only want pictures like that or other creepy things.

Ambidexter:
Well, I'm a girl, and I do get unwanted attention, both IRL and on the Internet. Sometimes I even do not specify my gender when registering at a forum, and they mistake me for a male (mainly because of my «brutal» nickname), and I'm totally OK with that. Seriously, when a guy thinks I'm male, we can talk normally, but as soon as he finds out I'm a girl, he starts perceiving me as a female, not as a person. That's the problem. So my advice would be as follows: when approaching a girl, forget that she's a girl. «What a cute avatar, did you draw it by yourself?» is an appropriate way to start a conversation. «Hey, you look cute» / «Your eyes are amazing» is NOT. You wouldn't tell that to a guy, would you? ~_^


--- Quote from: Cheetah on 08.11.2013, 12:51:51 ---Before going to your first furry con, were you concerned about unwanted attention? Has this actually held you back? How were your actual experiences at furry conventions? Did you get a lot of creeps following you - more than your male friends? Any stories to tell?
--- End quote ---
The largest con I've been to is Rusfurrence (200~300 participants, of which ~90% are guys). I went there with my boyfriend, but we were interested in unlike activities, so we often ended up in different locations of the hotel, and it looked as if I was single. From time to time, random guys made attempts to start a conversation with me, and all of them were, like, «Oh, wow, a girl! What brought you here?» My reply was always the same: «My boyfriend invited me». On hearing that, some disengaged immediately, others started an interrogation: «Who's your b/f? Do I know him? Why isn't he around?» One of them seemed to disbelieve every word of mine, he even tried to stand me a drink >_< So my next piece of advice is: give her the benefit of the doubt. After all, if you suspect that she is not being honest to you, why would you want to deal with such a liar?
Anyways, I can't say that any of these cases were troublesome. I've experienced more impudent harassment at my place of work (and on the Internet, of course, but that doesn't count). My final advice might sound controversial, but I'll still declare: no means no. Sure, the girl might be flirting, and her «no» might actually mean «maybe», as that joke about female logic asserts, but still — don't be too pushy. What you mistake for minauderie, might be her natural voice. (This is my case BTW: my voice is somewhat squeaky and meowing, which makes me sound exalted and rapt, even if I'm not.)

I could talk on this subject for long, but here in Moscow it's 6 AM already, so I'm wrapping up for now =) Kudos to everyone who plowed through this post, any objections and amendments would be appreciated =)

Honey:
I strongly disagree with that article. I find it rather stupid to be honest. So men should not approach women at cons (unless they are already friends) because then they will come off as creeps? Ah come on get real. Why should a woman, who just happens to be part of the furry fandom, be any different than from a woman who does not share this interest?

I had my share of creeps both inside and outside the fandom. Basically just use your brain a bit when you interact with (ANY) kind of person and you should be good. Just walking straight up to a woman and grab her boobs or crotch (that happened to me on several occasions both inside and outside the fandom) and then expect her to just want to jump into bed with you is what the majority would consider a very impolite and bad move.

If you just talk to us like you would talk to any other person you should be fine in most cases. In general, if the girl is not interested she will tell you and then you respect that choice, but that does not mean you are not allowed to talk to her ever again. My advice? Act natural, talk to us like you would talk to any person and just avoid randomly groping others private places without permission.

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