As promised, here is a transcribe as far as I could understand.
I am fairly sure for everything, but that last part of the recording about the reason they flooded the level 2 toilets was unclear to me.
So if a native German can make it out, feel free to correct it and I will included it in my transcribe.Edit after corrections from Druon at 20 sept. Thank you sir ^^
Notes:- This transcribe contains time codes for easy reference. These have been made on the time given by Media Player Classic. Both VLC and Firefox apparently report a different total run time, which seams to be faulty (I have run it with a stopwatch and goes out of sync quickly). Firefox will report the runtime of 3.39 and will count on beyond that point when it reaches it. VLC will just 'run quicker' to actually end on the 3.39.
- I have also included my original document in odt (open document format) which will work best in LibreOffice or OpenOffice. MS Office will work, but will moan about it a bit.
Enjoy
Eurofurence 21 dispatch center – Cheetah at the phone
Yes, this is security. We are at the second level and we have a small problem.
What is going on?
So to say, we are at the second level and the toilets are overflowing.
Then why are you calling me?
– 0:30You do not understand! I'm telling you: We are at the second level! And here are the toilets … <grumble grumble, wash, bubble bubble – End transmission>
Shit, that is starting out great...
Eurofurence 21 dispatch center
– 1:00Uhmm, Cheetah, we have a problem.
Agh agh, go ahead shoot...
The manager of the venue has walked in to the art show. We stumbled upon him screaming: 'My eyes, my eyes'!
Oh my god, where was the security!? You know very well, that it is to hard for normal people. Get a doctor!
That's to late; security is already here, but he has hung himself in the garden.
– 1:30Damnit. That is the 3rd time in a row. Okay, come upstairs. I will write a letter to the surviving relatives.
<End transmission>
Eurofurence 21 dispatch center
Hello Cheetah, this is security speaking from level one. There is water running from the ceiling and I'm guessing the toilets on the second level are again...
<grumble grumble, wash, bubble bubble – End transmission>
– 2:00*Grumbling and despairing Cheetah*
Eurofurence 21 dispatch center
Cheetah! Cheetah, it's terrible. In the depression workshop 5 people have killed themselves!
Yeah so!? That is what is supposed to happen.
< End transmission >
*Talking to himself* Does no one every read the program?
– 2:30Eurofurence 21 dispatch center
Hi Cheetah, you have to get down here immediately.
I can't leave here, what is the problem?
People here have released the cows!
Haha, very funny. I can make a fool out of myself without help.
< End transmission >
How stupid do people think I am?
– 3: 00Eurofurence 21 dispatch center
Oh hi, Cheetah. Are we actually insured?
Why do you want to know?
Oh... Nothing 'really' bad. There is just a broken window.
Phooo, and here I was thinking it was really something bad. But out of curiosity, what has happened?
Well, one of these rocks must have missed their mark...
– 3:30… What rocks?
Well... These protesters where very intoxicated and can't aim well anymore.
Uhhmm... Who?
The protestors! Today at noon one group of newbies went to the church quare to parade around in their anatomically correct fursuits. Unfortunately they ran into a rally by members of the Bible-believing Christian party
*1 and they thought we are the disciples of Satan. They really thought we wanted to burn down the city with that fire.
– 4:00What fire are you talking about!?
After Stefan Raab
*2 tried to video tape the orgy in the video showroom, that started when someone secretly sneaked in some animal porn, a couple of people really freaked out and poured napalm down from the second floor all over his outside broadcast van.
NAPALM!? Napalm, on my con!? What the heck is Napalm doing on my con?
How should I know? You're the organizer!
Yes damnit!... But but...
Come on easy now, the stupid napalm eventually burned up and the roof truss barely got damaged.
Barely got damaged?!
– 5:00Yes we simply clogged the toilets and so the fire couldn't spread... One moment, what is that... Wha.. haaaa!
<grumble grumble, wash, bubble bubble – End transmission>
*Cheetah crying* Why... Why always me!?
Furry-Eight-Thousand
For us nothing is too...
< End transmission >
References*1
Partei Bibeltreuer Christen: (Bible-sweater Christians Party), a small, but real party in Germany, not to confuse with the well-known Christian Democratic Union who most people probably would think of, when they hear about a Christian party.
*2
Stefan Raab: Prominent German entertainer, television host, comedian, and musician.