use Mayo for the Bretzel
Only if you like the feeling of everyone staring at you in disgust. Brezel belongs with butter (and maybe salt), and nothing else.
Really!?
In that case - it seems that I have been the victim of a prank.
Most americans are familiar with "pretzels" as salted, hard-baked breadstick snacks; in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, they are sold as "soft pretzels", and I have seen them sold at a kiosk in the airport in Pittsburgh...accompanied with Mustard ("senf"). On my first visit to Germany, I had bought some real brezels to eat on the train to Suhl, and when I asked for some mustard, was met with just such a look of shock by the shopkeeper. A fellow-traveller advisd me that mustard was a definite no-no, but that mayonaisse was a good condiment, which seemed to make sense as I usually have sandwiches made with mustard and mayo.
We americans are impulsive "dippers" and "dunkers"; we do it with most "finger foods". For example, It's common to dunk doghnuts into our coffee (or milk), particularly if they are less than fresh. Common Diner slang for a doughnut is a "Sinker", and it is the source for the name of the "Dunkin' Donuts" franchise.
******
In our third year in Magdeburg, the entire trip in from my doorstep until I arrived at the Hauptbahnhof had been a "trip through hell", with delays and a side-trip to London and an encounter with a Gypsie (Roma) thrown in; I arrived at 03:00 in the morning, roughly 12 hours late, tired and hungry, and paused for a burger at the McDonald's at the station. I ordered something called a combo meal of a "Big Texan" (something which isn't served in the USA), which came with some sort of red spicy "TexMex" sauce on the burger. I requested ice in my softdrink, which required the fraulein at the counter to go in the back and get some ice. Then while the burger was being cooked, she asked if I wished mayo or kechup, and I THOUGHT she meant for the burger. That was confusing, as It was supposed to come with the texmex sauce, but if she had to make the sauce fresh, I asked for it to include
both. "Nein! You may have one or the other! NOT "both"! Which is it to be?" And she said it so forcefully, while holding out packets of each condiment in each hand and with an air of urgency like this were a life-or-death decision, that I was thoroughly intimidated and stammered out that it was OK, I didn't actually require either condiment. This seemed to annoy her. "NO, No, you get one without charge, it is part of the order!" And there were people in line behind me, giving me odd looks. I insisted that I wouldn't require anything other than what came with the sandwich. "But one is
included! You must choose!"
At this point I was ready to flee the restaurant - I was tired and travel-weary and needed a room and a bath and a bed, and my judgement wasn't the best. Finally she dropped her arms to her sides and with a resigned air said that she would bring out my order when it was ready.
Only later, when I saw others using the condiment packets on their french fries, and noticed that Ketchup was NOT available by the napkins, did I discover that she was referring to the fries all along; that the condiment portion was carefully rationed, not take-as-you-need, and that the burger did have the TexMex spiced sauce, as specified on the menu board.
